It Isn't Fair...

Photo Credit: Morgan Nati

He stood there, amazed. Slack jawed and more than a little irritated; he was fuming! After a long day's work in the fields he was returning to bedlam. Where was his father? The revelers were dancing and playing instruments, the smell of roasted meat filled his nostrils and not far away a familiar but heartbreaking sound of a man's voice filled his ears. He pushed his way past the partiers, to find his brother seated with his father. Laughing and feasting he was wearing one of Father's finest robes over tattered rags and as his hand reached for another chunk of succulent meat he caught a glimpse of the ring as it shone in the firelight. A ring? The robe? Really? Fury began to build in his gut, fiery and acid with the taste of betrayal. As his father looked up and saw him, he spun on his heels. He couldn't stand it any longer - He had to get out of there before he exploded.

"Son?" His father caught up with him outside the large tent. "Won't you come in and celebrate with us? Your younger brother has returned! He is back!"

"How could you?" His heart pounded loudly in his ears, his chest near bursting with anger and humiliation. "How could you treat him like a king when you know as well as I do he was laying with prostitutes and wallowing with pigs? He wasted everything you gave him! Why on earth are you celebrating?"

"But he is back! Your brother is back - We had to celebrate!" His father looked genuinely confused.

"He doesn't deserve it. I never asked you for anything, yet he demands it all and you give it to him! You never threw me a feast for being the good son... It isn't fair!"

Have you been there? Have you ever watched as someone less deserving got the best piece of the pie? Have you ever wondered if there is justice in this world? I have. Many times. I have watched as our own family struggled, ate less than glamorously, didn't vacation, prayed as our business languished. I have looked up from the devastation that I felt and seen those that are so smug and wasteful, less than Christianly, prosper and flourish. I have watched as others enrich themselves on the soil of our despair... It was terrible. It was excruciatingly painful. It wasn't fair.

So where is God's justice? I mean, we hear about how fair He is and how He will be our ultimate Judge at the end of time. Does that mean that we don't get justice until then? We have to wait until the Rapture and return of Christ to see those that are undeserving get what's coming to them? Well, do we????

If I am waiting for that kind of justice, I hope to be waiting a very long time. I hope, for all of our sakes, that it is never fair.

God's love isn't built on justice. It isn't measured out in deserving spoonfuls based on what I have done for Him or how much I have tried to be a "good girl." Thank God for that! God's love - What we all crave whether we are aware of it or not - God's love is based in Mercy and Grace. I cannot earn it or achieve it. I can only ask for it. The very best part about having Him operate that way? If I ask for His love, genuinely and humbly, He will give it every time. Without fail, God will never deny me His love and His grace. That means no matter how ugly I have been, no matter how selfish, how hateful, how murderous my heart, God will always open His arms and welcome me back to His celebration. I am never turned from His table of plenty. He will never ask that I sit in the corner and watch as others eat. He always has my seat reserved for me.

I am comforted by that - for me. I don't much like it when I see others I judge as unworthy allowed the same grace. Why? Because my justice is skewed, my grace is nonexistent, I am without mercy in my heart. I am human. He is God. I look at the situation and want to view the repentance in action. I want to see that the person is really going to be sorry and change their ways. I look at the outward view of a man. God looks at the man's heart. He sees the repentance where it starts, He looks into the soul and judges there - There, where I cannot go.

It seems too easy, doesn't it? That someone can just say, "I'm sorry," to God and He accepts it without prejudice. It doesn't seem fair or right... It is the same with salvation. You don't have to DO anything. You only have to ask and viola! It is done for you. You instantly become a part of the family with all rights to inherit the kingdom of God. You would think that people would be signing up by the droves to get that kind of booty. They don't. It's too easy. Our human nature says there has to be some kind of ceremony, some sort of sacrifice...

The ease in which you and I are saved from an eternity of darkness came at a very high price, the ultimate in sacrifice. The only person to ever live this life without sinning (not even once) took all of it on for us. He did it all! Christ did everything we couldn't do, so that He could climb onto a cross and be covered in every sin - EVERY SIN - past, present and future! His own Father, who vows never to turn from us, turned from Him so that we could have it so easy.

I won't tell you that I don't struggle with the prodigal son thing... I won't tell you that I don't wonder at times why on Earth God allows such painful injustice to wallop me on the head and bring me low. I will tell you I get it. I get that God wanted it to be so easy that to not accept His love would be folly. I get that if I am allowed His grace for every nasty thing I have done and will do, I have to allow others the same process. God's love isn't fair.... And aren't I glad of that?! After all, I am the only one that stands in my way from attending the same feast - And if you know me, you know I rarely miss a party!

Be blessed... not fair.

Pick up the shovel and start digging!

We have all heard (and even uttered) the phrase, "Put down the shovel and walk away from the hole!" It is something I use with my husband often, especially when he is teetering on the edge of really pissing me off... It means, in short, stop talking before you say something you cannot take back or get out of gracefully. You are digging a verbal hole and you are going to make enemies if you don't stop. It's good advice... Sometimes.
I have been reading this guy and I am being challenged to actually pick up my shovel. He isn't necessarily a Christian - I don't think his message hinges on his religious preference at all. He is, however, motivational while being aggressively in-your-face with what he has to say. I don't necessarily like the cursing - but as I have stated before, I can work past that if the message is right. And his message is right.
So often I talk myself into the lull and the lie that I can't say certain things here because it wouldn't be "right" or it isn't the right place. I might alienate readers or I might not get God's message across because I offended someone. The truth of what living the Christian life is about is controversial, though. Jesus was a radical! He was in your face and used language that the uppity-ups viewed as inflammatory and blasphemous. He didn't dilute His message to please everyone, on the contrary - He amped up the reality of what He was saying and pared back the BS.
Funny thing happens when you pare back the BS... Your message - your real message - comes across loud and clear. There is no room for misinterpreting what you are saying. It makes you stand out. It shines your light without a dimmer switch or a lampshade to soften it. It makes you vulnerable and it makes you believable. Let me be crystal clear about what it isn't. It isn't an excuse to be ignorant. It isn't a reason to attack others on a personal level and name call or make assumptions about their private lives. Pare back the BS, not civility. Don't wander around the point, get to it and settle in. You may not be agreed with, but at least you stand a good chance of being respected for it.
When I started this new blog, I promised myself I would take off the gloves. I have let that slide. I have softened and I have disappointed some of my own desires because of it. I cannot say that I won't do it again. Some days I just don't have the energy to get real. Isn't that sad? It's sad, not because my readers will be sad, it's sad because those are the times I am lying to myself just to get through the day. Pathetic.
So here it is... Getting real and letting you see more of me than you may have wanted.
* I am a Republican. I believe in letting people make their own decisions about healthcare, business, and contraception. I believe that making others accountable for my actions is wrong. If I decide not to buy insurance and I get a horrible disease, I think you should let me die. I will be sad and possibly regretful, but making that choice is my right. Quit telling me that I am too stupid to make my own decisions and that government has to babysit me. I am pretty damned smart and I don't appreciate the condescension. And I don't appreciate someone telling me that I have to pay for someone else's choice either. There was a time when responsibility mattered and people got stronger for it. I want that back.
* I support horse slaughter. When you see first hand, as I have, the neglect and mistreatment of these horses that no one wants to care for properly, you begin to understand the true definition of humane treatment. God gave us the animals to be a part of our lives, not us to them. Get it straight and make a choice.
* I am a pathetic people pleaser and getting this real is scaring the crap outta me! I want my message to matter, however, and because of that I will keep going.
* Being a Christian is the most difficult, obscure and frustrating thing I have ever done. I am ridiculed, marginalized, taken for granted and often lonely. It is also the only thing that I have done that is worth doing even though it hurts, except maybe childbirth - and that too is closely tied to my Christian beliefs, so go figure. I do things that others won't because of my faith. I take risks that don't pan out because of my faith. My investment in my walk is more important than whether or not I have money in my account but sometimes even I wonder what in the hell I am doing it for. It won't stop me. I can still choose, and I choose Him.
* I am more afraid of succeeding than failing. I am sure you are too. Know how I am sure? Because failing is expected. Failing is planned for, waited on and accepted daily. Failing doesn't get you noticed. Failing doesn't put you out there. Failing in this day and age is safe. Ask Lindsay Lohan. Ask Donald Trump. Ask anyone really. Failing is a big, fat non-event. Success... Now that is some scary stuff! If you succeed you must be accountable. If you succeed, there will be consequences and stands to make. I am not afraid of failing - Failing would be welcomed in the face of succeeding and becoming even more real. I challenge you to download that little book and really take a look at what you are scared to succeed at.
(Takes deep breath...) Here's the deal. I was called out today. I was called out to make a stand as I see it. It doesn't mean that I don't value my friends who have differing viewpoints. I am not that narrow-minded. It does mean that I have been holding back a part of me in order to not rock any boats. I have come to believe that rocking boats has value. People who rock boats make a difference and I want to make a difference.
If I have pissed you off, unfollow me. I get it. You don't want to be confronted and made to listen to things you don't like. I feel that way too. But I also hold value in the things that make me mad and require me to examine why. I read stuff that really irritates the crap outta me. I examine it and I come up with what I think on the subject. It makes me stronger. It makes me viable. It makes me believe. It doesn't threaten me or what I love. It's an opinion. My grandfather had a saying about opinions: "Opinions are like (inserting slightly cleaner version here, Grampa...in the interest of civility, of course) butt-cracks. Everyone has one and no one is particularly interested in yours." True. And if you are no longer interested, see ya.
If, however, what I have said resonates for no other reason than to fuel your fire and make you distill down what you truly believe, then GREAT! That was what I was after. I am all about a respectful, impassioned response. Ideas are meant to be batted around, not people. Pick up your shovel and start digging. You may just strike gold...